We all know that the real unemployment figures aren’t near 10%, they are really closer to 25% when you count people who have given up looking, run out of benefits, or are other wise not “in the system.” So why not spread the work that is available around to everyone who wants to work?
One way to put everyone back to work quickly would be to cut the work week by that same 25%, or to create a mandatory 30-hour work week. Continue reading “One Way to Cure the Economy ASAP” »
The one skill that I am most proud of is my typing speed. I can type about 65wpm. That’s pretty good. It stops people in their tracks from time to time as they walk by my desk to stand and stare, and too often comment about how fast I type.
The truth is, I’m amazed too.
You see, I took typing as a freshman in high school. I was pretty motivated since at the time I hoped to grow up and become a
writer, or maybe a reporter some day. I thought typing would be a good thing to know how to do in that career. So I signed up and started class.
And luckily for me, the teacher really liked me. I wasn’t very good at typing. I got a D-. While I wasn’t good at typing, I was good at math, and I know that I didn’t actually earn that D! By the end of the semester I could type about 25 words a minute as long as I was looking at my fingers. When I looked at the book like I was supposed to I either slowed down to 10wpm or got so many errors that my net speed was less than zero.
I was the worst typist on the face of the earth… or at least in the running.
I took typing again in college. The course was graded on your ability to improve your typing speed. I got a B. Good thing the teacher warned us about going slow on the first timed test or I may have flunked again.
And again, I took a typing class at a trade school and dropped out before I got through the class.
And another trade school where I barely managed to get through the course with 30wpm. It was a self-paced course with about 30 classes. I spent as much time getting through that typing class as I did on all the others combined.
So how can I type so fast now?
When I was pregnant with my first child I spent the last few months of my pregnancy at home… playing “letter invaders.” It was a video game and it helped pass days that would otherwise have been boring. There were no teachers, no grades. Just an endless stream of alien ships dropping letters and words on Earth… with only me to protect the world. 
One factor in my success was less pressure. I was just playing, so it didn’t matter if I failed. I could always start the game over. In fact, I could even manage to turn the computer off without saving and pretend the whole round never happened if I wanted to.
The other factor was practice. Practice, practice, and more practice. I spent at least 40 hours a week playing for about 3 months. And I was not typing 65 words a minute back then. I was averaging just over 40… the cut off point a lot of temp agencies had back then for administrative assistant jobs. I’d managed to get and even keep a few because I had other computer skills that compensated for my unfortunate fingers.
So I started working full-time in jobs that required typing. And gradually, over YEARS, my speed came up to the point that people walking down the hall will stop and stare at my fingers flying over the keyboard.
Typing may not be my most impressive skill. But it is the one I’m most proud of. That’s because I worked so hard to achieve it.
In everyone’s life, some things come easy and others barely come if at all.
One way to deal with that is to only pursue the things you are good at and give up on any interests that don’t come naturally to you.
The other way to deal with it is to pursue your dreams with the determination that you will keep trying no matter how many times you fail and find ways to overcome any road blocks.
Some of my Christian friends enjoy the quote, “There are no atheists in foxholes.” It would seem that even those who don’t believe in God can find themselves in a circumstance that inspires prayer.
Prayers can be part of your religious tradition. You may say them at holidays, bedtime, or mealtime. Some people pray best by singing or humming, others by sitting still and quiet and “listening”.
In it’s most basic form, prayer makes us feel more connected. Connected to God if we believe in God. Connected to the universe or some kind of life force. Connected to our family, friends, community.
Prayer can ease our worries. It can help us focus on our desires. Or prayer can inspire use to new insights. We can find solutions to problems, learn to forgive ourselves or others, or find peace of mind.
So why teach a child to pray? Well, because you want to be a good parent.
For many people, especially those raised in a strong religious tradition, teaching their children to pray is one of a long list of “shoulds”.
When I was about 5 years old. I asked my mother to teach me to pray. I think that put her on the spot. I could sense it made her uncomfortable, but at 5 I was very persistant. My efforts finally got a cute little poem that I could say at bedtime.
“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord, my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake. I pray the Lord, my soul to take.”
It seems strange to me now that at 5 years old I wouldn’t be satisfied with this answer, especially in a family that was known to use some funny prayers at times. I was happier when later that year a Sunday School teacher explained that prayer was just talking to God. Just like we would talk to anyone else.
If you think that 5 is too young to teach a child to pray, you may be right. You know your children better than anyone else. But that was about the same age that my children asked me to teach them to pray. I shared my Sunday School teacher’s advice with them, not my mothers.
The hardest part though, is setting an example. I’m pretty sure that my mother did not say cute little poems for her prayers. But prayer can be a very personal thing, and you may not feel comfortable praying in front of your children. Even if it is uncomfortable, many times your example is the best teacher of all.
Most religions have some form of prayer. What we teach our children depends a lot on how we were raised and what we believe now.
Muslims, for example, have a very strict way of praying. They pray 5 times a day, and with a lot of ceremony. I think it must be easy to teach a Muslim child to pray because there is such a structured way of doing it.
Catholics have it easy too. They have books of standard prayers that children (and adults) can memorize for just about every imaginable situation.
With traditional religions like this there is so much form to prayer that they seem very confident they are “doing it right”. This confidence has to make it easier to teach your child to pray. If you know what you are doing, and are comfortable doing it, then your kid won’t pick up on the discomfort I got from my mother.
If you are part of a less structured religious faith, then the best advice I can offer is to become comfortable with your own style of prayer first. Once you feel good about how you pray, teach your child to do what you are doing. Let them see you pray. Let them hear the kind of things you pray for.
One of the most famous Christian prayers is “The Lord’s Prayer”. This is the prayer that was recorded in the New Testement when Jesus’ disciples asked him how to pray. And it is a favorite topic of sermons on how to pray.
Our Father, which art in heaven, hallowed by they name. They kingdom come, they will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts as we forgive those who trespass against us.
Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the glory and honor forever. Amen.
In some cultures and religions prayers are changed or sung instead of “said”.
This can help in remembering words if you are trying to get your child to memorize a prayer.
It can also help to release the feelings in your heart if you add music to your prayer. It may be instrumental music that matches your mood. Or it may beinspirational songs that help you get centered and focus on the things you are grateful for, or the things you are trying to achieve in your personal growth.
Meditatoin is sometimes described as just sitting, or breathing.
I like to think of meditation as the “listening” side of prayer. Sure there are things I want, things I feel I need to say. But the most rewarding time of prayer (for me) is when I feel like I’ve been inspired with some new thought or new way of seeing a situation.
Meditation is also a very good way to relieve stress, elinimate worry, and achieve peace of mind.
And meditation can be very hard for a young child to learn!!
On the other hand, it can be rewarding for a parent to be able to have a little peace and quiet while her child is “meditating”.
Whatever method of prayer you choose, prayers mean most when they come from the heart.
I enjoyed the video above, in spite of it’s being an advertisement because there were so many helpful moments where we see how this woman gets kids to think and talk about praying.
For some parents, your kids may make your job easier by asking how to pray. But if you are trying teach your child how to pray when they have not asked, then warming up to the conversation can be a good way to start. Practicing talking about things like what you are grateful for, or just having a conversation with another person can build a foundation for understanding and learning the best prayers… the spontaneous prayers from the heart.
I would win it. I’m sure I could. The one thing my friends and family always seem to say is how no matter what I pick myself up and keep going. (That’s when they are trying to be nice…)
Things go wrong for everyone. I used to get stressed when they did. But now I look at my failures not just for lessons to learn (about what not to do) but also for opportunities.
The truth is, I like starting over. I do it a lot when I’m playing my favorite computer game. I like to try different things. Sometimes I try to do things better, but sometimes I just want to see what would happen if I did something really outrageous. (Like start a nuclear war… it’s just a video game after all.)
Life would be more fun if we could look at it like a video game and not like “life and death” all the time. There are a lot of things in life that really aren’t “life and death,” and yet we treat them like they are.
Failure is just a chance to begin again, to rebuild and do things better this time. It doesn’t matter if it’s a server crash (like the one that has me rebuilding this website), a failed marriage, a missed rent payment, or a lost job. We can always go forward and make things better.
You can find a better spouse. It’s true. If your marriage failed than the one you left (or who left you) wasn’t really that great in the first place. We all deserve someone who can love us for who we really are. How many failed marriages are the result of people who are trying (and failing) to be someone that they are not… but someone who will please their spouse?
And jobs, well, I know they are tought to find these days, but there are always better jobs out there. And if there isn’t a better job, then maybe you can make a better job by starting your own business and doing things the way you think they should be done. Maybe even doing things you love to do?
If you are trying to cope with a failure in your life, or to pick up the pieces and start over, don’t be afraid to enjoy the process and believe that the new life you are beginnig will be even better than the old life that wasn’t working out that great anyway.
It can be better. You can make it better. And you can let go of any guilt or depression or embarassment that you are feeling over the old stuff that didn’t work out. Just imagine if there was an award for starting over… now, go win that award!
You don’t have to be afraid of your budget. When people think about budgeting, they automatically begin to think about cutting their spending.
Budgeting is knowing how you spend your money and spending it that way on purpose. If you create your budget with this in mind you can relieve your guilt over spending rather than increase it.
Start with what you spend now.
If you don’t know, then track your spending for a month. Organize all your purchases into categories and see how much you spend in each category.
Compare the total spending to your total income.
This is a discovery phase. Don’t worry if your spending is more than you make. Maybe that is why you think you need a budget.
Just look at the US Governemnt though… not all budgets balance.
The main thing is to know how much you are spending and what you are spending it on.
The second step to creating a budget you can live on is to compare your spending to your income. Is it more or less? I’m not going to make assumptions here. You are surviving life so far, so there is a good chance you are already spending less than you make.
If you aren’t, then you have to decide whether you want to decrease your spending or increase your income. Even if you have a balanced budget now, are you able to spend your money on the thing you really want? If not, then look for ways to increase your income. (See the top 10 ways to increase your income below.)
Some people prefer to think of their budget as a “spending plan.”
You will also want to look at how comfortable you are with your current spending patterns. Are there items you want, but put off every month because you don’t feel like you have enough money? Or maybe there are items you buy on impulse, without considering if you have enough money or not?
Once you see what you are spending, you can begin to make your choices more consciously. Moving things around on paper gives you a chance to use the money you have to provide more of the things you really want. Maybe you can cut back on your impulse spending in order to have a little left over for some of the luxuries you’ve been putting off.
I’m 45-years-old and I’ve had more employers than I can remember. This is the first time I’ve ever had one who didn’t pay me what he owed. It just seems like there should be something that you can do. I mean, you did the work, right? You should get paid.
I asked this question a couple weeks ago hoping that someone here might have some experience, but the answers were mostly guesses. I did continue to look for answers though. I mean really, I figure the guy owes me about $2500 … that’s worth a day’s research, don’t you think?
Most states have similar laws, but you will want to find out how your state may differ from Oregon.
In Oregon, your employer is required to give you your final check on the day you quit… if you gave him at least 48 hours notice. If you quit without notice he has 48 hours to get you your final check. They are required to mail the check too.
In addition to your pay, you may be entitled to “penalty wages.” For every day past this cut-off the employer is responsible to pay you up to 8 hours at your regular rate. Unfortunately, you have to sue them to collect the extra wages, and it caps out at 100% of the amount owed in your final check.
I also learned that a lot of excuses like “they didn’t give notice” or “they didn’t return their tools” don’t help the employer out legally. You did the work, they owe you the money. Your responsibility is to provide proof that you were an employee and what hours you worked there.
If you are thinking about quiting your job you may want to start copying your time card, receipts, or anything else that might help you verify your employment. Make sure you have the name address and phone number of a few co-workers – especially one would be willing to sign a statement that you really did work there your final few days or weeks.
There is a form that you fill out to get the state to collect your wages for you. It also becomes a matter of public record. Even if you don’t want to be bothered, or maybe you aren’t owed that much, but at least it can serve as a warning to other people who are researching the bum as a potential employer. You can also file a claim against an employer for not paying on time, not paying over-time, etc. You may not be able to collect money, but you can make the complaint part of the public record so other people will be warned about the company or person who has not paid you what you earned.
In my case, I told my employer that I was filling out the forms and he mysteriously appeared on my doorstep two days later (in spite of supposedly being broken down in Georgia…???) with a check in hand. The amount is still in dispute, but he’s bending over backwards to try to make me happy with the pay before I actually mail in this claim. Don’t know what the state would do to him, but I guess he doesn’t want to find out.
I may still file a claim for the “late” issue though. People really ought to be able to find out about this kind of thing before they accept a job.
Are you…
…too fat? … too thin?
…too short? … too tall?
…too smart? … too stupid?
…too mean? … too nice?
…too quiet? … too loud?
…too rich? … too poor?
…too early? … too late?
Maybe you notice, like me, that all of thses “issues” start with the same word… “too”.
One of the reasons that we have issues with ourselves is that we are always comparing ourselves to others, and most often to some non-existant standard of perfection. How can one girl who is 5’7″ say she is too tall, while another girl who is 5’7″ thinks she is too short?
The problem with our image issues is one of judgement as often as one of actual fact.
In spite of the fact our “toos” are mostly in our minds, we let our self-perception influence our actions.
I’d invite you over, but my house is too messy.
I’d apply for that job, but I’m too stupid.
I’d say hello to that cute guy, but I’m too fat.
The problem is, most people think that declaring bankruptcy is the problem. The real problem is when you are bankrupt… whether you admit it or not.
We are lucky that the founding fathers of our country were aware of the problems that come with bankruptcy. Back in England there were debtor’s prisons where they put people who couldn’t pay their bills. Instead of creating a system like England though, they provided for laws to discharge debts when they got to be too much to handle.
While it’s better to avoid going into debt in the first place, sometimes it’s not possible. There are people who have unavoidable circumstances… especially with medical bills. How do you avoid going into debt if you are injured in a car accident, taken to the hospital, and treated while you are unconscious. When you wake up, you find out you owe more than you make in a year, maybe even more than you make in a decade!
Not everyone who is bankrupt is so totally bameless though. Most of us are tempted by offers of credit at one point or another. We buy houses, cars, go to college, need to replace a broken freezer before our food thaws out and spoils. It seems like a good deal at the time. We have plenty of income to make payments when we get into the debt. But then something happens to that income. We get laid off or fired. Our next job only pays half what the last one did.
The only way you can be 100% sure to avoid becoming bankrupt is to avoid going into debt in the first place.
If you have and debts at all, then there is always a possibility that some change in your life circumstances will make it impossible for you to repay them. If you don’t want to go bankrupt then get out of debt as quickly as possible and make every effort to avoid any future credit.
According to the US Debt Clock the average consumer debt per person in America is over $52,000. The average household income is only around $45,000 and many of those households have more than one person in them! This would suggest that most Americans are probably bankrupt, even if they haven’t filed any legal documents to make it official.
I hear too many people complaining about the deadbeats that file bankruptcy. It seems to me like and alcoholic complaining about someone who goes to AA. Most of us normal folks are just one accident away from being forced into bankruptcy ourselves. Not everyone can be Bill Gates of Donald Trump. And I’m not going to be suprised if we see one of these big names in bankruptcy either.
There is something fundamentally wrong with how our economy works.
People “need” to go into debt in order to survive. They pay for their education with loans so they can get a decent job. Then they pay for their groceries with credit cards because the decent job doesn’t quite cover their household expenses. They need a car to get to work, so they take out a car loan. And they need to buy a home of their own to be respectable (or because the mortgage payments are cheaper than rent…)
If someone does manage to keep on top of all their bills then they have a right to feel proud of their accomplishment. It’s not easy to keep up. And many people get depressed and give up because they can’t pay ALL the bills every month.
I wish that we could find a way to fix the system instead of judging the people who fail to keep their finances together, or even blaming them for being the problem.
If you are bankrupt… if you don’t earn enough to pay your bills every month and just keep falling farther and farther behind. Bankruptcy is still an option. It’s better to file as soon as you realize you are bankrupt than to wait until you have used up your last dime trying to get out of debt.
If you aren’t bankrupt yet, then take steps to eliminate debt form your life. Get out of debt and stay out of debt. Keep in mind that bad things happen to even the best people and try to be prepared for personal emergencies.
I have a work friend who recently ran for office. He is one of the BEST people I know. I would give him high marks for honesty. So yes, honest people can get into politics. I would even say many start out honest.
Throughout the campaign, I saw that getting into politics was very stressful. Near the end of the race he commented to me that, “it’s not hard to believe people who get into politics become corrupt, it’s a miracle if they don’t”. Continue reading “Do You Have to be Dishonest to be a Politician?” »
But my (former) boss doesn’t know that… I was at the bank (again) trying to cash his phoney check when he called to tell me he needed me to wait another week before the check would be good.
But guess what?
The bank thought it was good! So I’ve got another month of living expenses now, and I got the stupid wage claim form filed with the state in hopes they can help me collect the OTHER half of my final paycheck that the bum owes me.
It was kind of hard to get out of my comfort zone and get those papers filed. I’ve never had to do anything like that before. I guess I have been lucky that most of my former employers have been more honest about paying people … and on time.
It’s good to have that behind me though.
I still have taxes to file though. It’s about the same amount of work.
Why don’t people pay you to jump through extra hoops to get paid for the work you already did? Feels like work… I should get paid extra for having to do collections on this paycheck.
Really…
Self-Fulfillment is achieving your hopes and dreams. Reaching self-fulfillment will come as a result of your own efforts. The goal at Healing Image Issues is to help as many people along their path to self-fulfillment as we can. No one can do it for you, but we hope to point the way, warn you of some of the pitfalls along the way, and encourage you to keep going when you feel like quitting… or to get back up and try again if you fall down.
Another term for self-fulfillment is self-actualization. That was coined by a psychologist, Kurt Goldstein. It was later used by Abraham Maslow in his fairly well-known, hierarchy of needs.
In the hierarchy of needs, self-fulfillment lies at the very top. It’s difficult to find self-fulfillment when you are struggling with more basic needs like where your next meal is coming from, or feeling unloved.
Feeling unloved is a key symptom of low self-esteem. Increasing your self-esteem, and your self-confidence is a key factor in reaching self-fulfillment.
You may wonder if reaching for self-fulfillment is selfish. It can seem that way at times. I’m sure people who are actively pursuing self-fulfillment hear this accusation from time to time. If you pursue your own needs before someone else, especially if they are asking for your help, then they may call you selfish. They may believe you are being selfish. They may also be trying to “push your buttons” in order to manipulate you into doing things their way. (Which is actually kind of selfish of them, don’t you think?)
But let me ask you this…
If you had one dollar, and you knew you had the winning lottery numbers figured out, but on your way to buy your lottery ticket a homeless man asks you to give him your dollar… are you being selfish to say “no”?
I think you are not. I actually think it is more selfish to give the man your dollar when you could win the lottery and buy him a whole meal, or even a house to live in.
While winning the lottery may not be a good example, pursuing your own self-fulfillment is a lot like having those winning lottery numbers. Somewhere, deep down inside of you, you KNOW that you are special. Everyone has something that only they can give back to the world. Where would the world be if some of those people hadn’t found that special something and worked to develop it?
People who achieve great things in their lives are reaching self-fulfillment. And in doing so, they can make the world a better place, make the kind of money that allows them to help others, give back gifts that only they could give.
You are special too, don’t you owe it to yourself and everyone else in your life to let those special gifts out?
Sure, it may seem selfish at times when you have to make choices about pursuing your own self-fulfillment or helping someone else. And sometimes helping others will be the best way to reach self-fulfillment. Always chasing the approval and goals of someone else is not.
Set some boundaries.
… but he doesn’t want me to cash it until the 15th!
I had to threaten to file a wage claim with the state to get that much. His story changes every time I talk to him. And the check in question is about half what I think he owes me. His story about that kept changing all day today as well. Continue reading “I Finally Got a Check…” »
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I wouldn’t call it major or chronic.
I’ve suffered from depression before and no one was really ever able to decide exactly what type of depression I had (or have). I’ve been labeled something different by every shrink I’ve ever talked to: chronic, severe, manic, borderline personality.
If it’s a type of depression, someone out there thinks I have it.
In my case, having lived with it most of my life, I’m going to call it “situational depression.” I get depressed about a problem I’m having, or a situation I feel traped in and the depression disipates whenever I feel like there is hope or a way out of my current difficulty.
I suppose that would appear manic to some people.
I get depressed when I am stuck. I get happy and have more energy when I believe taht there is a way out. I apply that energy to following the plan that I’m believing will work.
I think that belief has a big roll in the mood. Sometimes when you are depressed it’s hard to believe that anything could change or that it will ever get better. It’s really easy to dismiss suggestions that others give you. Their idea may seem too hard, or you may have tried it or something vey much like it before and it didn’t work.
But there is also some part of being depressed that makes you more skeptical about how things will work out. And it can keep you from being creative enough to come up with your own ideas and solutions too.
The main problem with this argument about redistributing wealth is that people fail to define exactly what “redistribution” and “wealth” mean in the first place.
For conservatives wealth is what they take home in their paycheck, and redistribution is any tax withheld. For liberals wealth is generally defined as the money in someone else’s (possibly Swiss) bank account, and redistribution is defined as paying their fair share of the taxes.
I want to avoid this misunderstanding by stating what I believe redistribution of wealth really is. Redistribution of wealth is when wealth is exchanged from one person or institution to another. This is the foundation of capitalism, and most other economic systems!
How would you feel, as a hard working middle class person, if the government taxed you 50% and then gave you food stamps to use instead of your paycheck next time you went grocery shopping? What if the government picked up your day care tab as well? What if they put a cap on how much your landlord could raise the rent? Or kicked in a standard amount toward that rent? Now your hard earned dollars could be used to pay for luxuries instead of necessities. This would be the dreaded socialism.
Who is going to pay for that? Well, the richest few percent of people would.
Does that mean that the government is going to confiscate everything they own? Of course not. It means they will pay higher taxes. Maybe it would mean a 50% tax instead of 38%. Maybe it would mean eliminating loopholes in the tax code.
Half of a million dollars is still much more than half of a middle class paycheck. And half of a billion dollars is still way more than that. People who work hard and earn more would still be able to live a better lifestyle than ordinary middle class folks. But the poorest of the poor would no longer have to worry about food, clothing, and shelter because these services would be provided to everyone.
If socialism were done right, the “handouts” would be applied to everyone, including the Bill Gates and Warren Buffets of the world. We’d all pay a little more in taxes, but those who worked would have more left over at the end of the month for the fun stuff because their basic needs were already covered. That’s how I define “right to life”… as a right to the necessities of life.
Taxes would be like your “membership fee” to use the services that your government provided. (Which is why I believe they should also be given to ALL citizens regardless of income.) Setting up taxes on a sliding scale gives everyone a fair chance at making the most of themselves. People who have homes can find jobs easier. Kids who aren’t starving learn more. People who have good health care can often prevent emergency room visits.
In the long run, a more socialistic system of redistributing our wealth could bring down the overall maintenance costs of society and level the playing field so more people could qualify as “wealthy” in the first place.
Let’s say you have a great idea for a business or invention. You need money to start your new business to manufacture and market your new invention. So you go to a bank, family and friends, or an angel investor and ask them for a loan. They are redistributing their wealth to you. They do this because they believe you have a good idea and you will be redistributing even more wealth back to them after a reasonable period of time.
Or if you are a hard working individual and bring home a paycheck. You will probably be giving a portion to your landlord, the grocery store, maybe even the day care center. You are redistributing your wealth to the people and businesses that provide you with goods and services.
My parents came into town last night and invited us to dinner at a buffet place. Talk about temptation! Good thing diet isn’t at the top of my list of resolutions this year. I did overhear a few snippets of conversation though as I walked around the restaurant. I think there may have been more than one broken resolution last night.
Have you broken your New Year’sResolutions yet?
I expect success at keeping my resolutions this year. I’ve learned a few things about resolutions and goal setting that help me get closer to the mark year after year.
One of the best ways to keep things real is to look at what you’ve accomplished in the past. If you lost 20 pounds on your best diet attempt in the past, losing 100 pounds this year may not be realistic. However, losing 25 would be.
You want to pick goals that will challenge you. Sometimes goals can be too easy and so fall victim to boredom and procrastination. The best goals will push you to try a little harder than you have in the past… but not too much harder.
On the other side of the coin, a goal that is unrealistic (based on past sxperience) will lead to discouragement and giving up… often before you’ve even really started. An example of this would be someone who wanted to lose over 100 pounds this year and went back for seconds at that buffet. Because the goal is so big, even one mistake may make it look impossible and give you are reason to admit failure early in the process.
Speaking of process. Reaching goals, or keeping your resolutions is a process. Keep in mind that you don’t have to go cold turkey, or take an “all-or-nothing” approach.
Take some time to write down where you are now. Want to exercise more? Well, how much exercise are you doing now (or late last year)?
If you were running 2 miles a day, and then pushed it up to 5 miles. And then had some kind of setback that put you back to 3 miles. You are STILL keeping your resolution. (3 miles a day is more than 2 miles a day.)
If you haven’t been exercising at all, and resolved to do “more”, then even that one workout on New Year’s day has made you successful. Keep pushing yourself. Go from once a week to twice a week, and then to 3-4 times a week. By the end of the year you may not only manage to exercise practically every day, you might even like it more because you have cut yourself some slack from time to time and worked up to your goal at a reasonable rate.
Sometimes it’s hard to realize how much you have already accomplished. So write it down somewhere that you can take a look now and then and see exactly how far you have come.
You don’t need to review your goals every day. But you should review them on a regular basis.
Whether you review your progress daily, weekly, or even monthly, the review process will help you keep your goals in sight. It will let you know if your resolve is slipping and remind you to try harder before it’s too late and you feel like you can’t keep trying at all. It will also give you positive feedback when you are on track, and occasionally way out ahead, of your goals.
Acknowledging your progress can help you stay motivated. When you are doing well, don’t forget to reward yourself. You might consider a night on the town, a shopping spree, or even just a pat on the back.
Don’t think of your New Year’s Resolutions as being set in stone. If you discover that your resolution to write daily is really ending up as writing 3 times a week, then be willing to revise your goal to be closer to your actual performance. This way you can feel good about what you are accomplishing instead of giving up because you had a bad day or two.
One of the things you discover when you monitor your progress is that the cost of your goal may not be worth the results you are achieving. You may realize that there are other more important goals.
Or you may realize that even though your goal is still important to you, your time line is longer (or shorter) than you originally believed.
Let yourself change your mind from time to time. It’s better to give up on a goal after serious evaluation than to just let it fall by the wayside.
The most important thing about keeping your resolutions is to not give up. Remember this isn’t all or nothing. Just because you had one little cigarette this afternoon doesn’t mean you can’t stop smoking this year. You have all year to keep trying. By using these tips, especially tracking your progress, you can still keep your resolution this year.
Whatever your goals in life, if you keep them in mind and keep working toward them, eventually you will get there. You don’t really fail until you stop trying.